What If?

" 'What' and ‘if’ two words as nonthreatening as words come.

 But put them together side-by-side,

and they have the power to haunt you

 for the rest of your life: 

‘What if?'..."

"I don't know how your story ended.
But I know that if what you felt then was love - 

true love - then it's never too late.

If it was true then it why wouldn't it be true now?

 You need only the courage to follow your heart.

"I don't know what a love like that feels like... 

a love to leave loved ones for

 a love to cross oceans for... 

but I'd like to believe if I ever felt it.

 I'd have the courage to seize it. 

I hope you had the courage to seize it. 

And if you didn't, I hope one day that you will."

Today I was watching the end of the movie, "Letters to Juliet"  I have seen this movie many times and while I always thought it was cute and entertaining I never payed close attention to the last part of the movie, the letter that was written that changed everything. And holy cow, I LOVE IT! For many reasons, but mainly for the beginning " 'what' and 'if' two words as nonthreatening as words come. But put them together, side by side... and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life "what if...?" " Seriously Letters to Juliet? Could you be any more spot on? Kudos to the writers because that paragraph is serious mmmazing. 

Getting ready for this trip, there have been a lot of people who have been incredibly supportive, a lot who have been supportive but very skeptical, and a few who down right do not want me to go. When things fell through with Andrea, I was faced with a decision... to go alone? Or to stay home another year and go next fall when she could. For me, it was never a question... I was going to do this. Sure I was nervous and still am about going alone and making friends but the excitement and comfort I feel whenever I think about this trip trumps those nerves a million to one.  

How lucky am I to be in a position in my life where I can pick up and move to the other side of the world for five months? I could stay home, and I could move out with friends and finish school really early. I could move up to Salt Lake and be with all my friends up there. I could stay home and not miss two of my best friends weddings. I could stay home and do so, so much. Believe me, I have thought about not going. I have. It's hard to leave familiarity and the people that love you but I think if I didn't do this, I think if I didn't step WAY out of my comfort zone and take a giant leap of faith I would always wonder what if.  

So here's to lots of prayers and pondering, lots of advice and guidance, a few "pros and cons" lists, one or two melt-downs.... and no what-ifs.