Imbeciles I say! Imbeciles!

For those of you who have a hard time reading.

Imbeciles= *Imm-ba-siles*

got it? Good.

If not, you just prove my point all the more.

Kiiiiiding..

Mom says I'm going to get warts on my face..

because I like to vent about stupid people.

But I wouldn't have to vent about them if they weren't Imbeciles.

Cereal. There are some winners out there.

And they all seem to gather at my work.

I work at a hotel.. for those of you who dont' know.

No lie ladies and gentleman.

Last night Everything about these fools at my work.

drove me incredibly mad.

So naturally,

I went home, plopped on my moms bed.

And let her have it.

I vented like I have never vented before.

She laughed... and cried (not quite.. but I think she was afraid)

and said she has never seen me this way before.

And then she said something about a full moon being the cause of my crazy?

Okay mom... enough voodoo for you!

Mom listened to me vent for about 40 minutes.

And then she kicked me off her bed.

Literally.

The woman wants her sleep!

But the thing is .. I wasn't done venting.

I still have more to purge out of my system.

Lucky you!

Here are just a few of my favorite Imbecile Guest moments.

1. "I need a room for this evening....I'm "Platinum Elite" Ohh I'm sorry Sir/Ma'am... we are all sold out this evening. Well... I'm Platinum...are you telling me there are noo rooms?: Youuuu Imbecile. Seriously, if I HAD a room to sell you, I promise I would. YOU pay my paycheck sir. I promise I am not just refusing to sell you a room because you are a snobby bald man with bad teeth. I am not lying. We really are sold out... pinkie swear! Yes, yes you are "Guaranteed a room" because of your "Elite Status" ... but that was 24 hours ago...and for staying 75+ nights out of a year in a hotel.. you should be very aware of that. Fool!
2. "Can I get directions to said place? " Sure! *Proceed to give directions*  "well.. wouldn't it be faster if I went this way?" Seriously? I am about to beat you up. WHY are you asking me directions if you already know how to get there? And no, it would not be faster. I have lived here my whole stinkin life.. I know these streets! Seriously.. Imbacile.
3. "Are there pool towels? Or do we need to use our bath towels?" I absolutely LOATHE this question. Please tell me at what Hotel you have ever, ever had to use your bath towel for the pool? Mom pointed out that at some cheap hotels they may do this. But this is not a Motel 6 folks, this is a Marriott... the pool towels are out by the pool.
4. "Somehow you managed to key my cards incorrectly and my door won't open" You're right sir... no matter that I have keyed like 23890482374 cards in my time working here. I purposely made yours so they wouldn't work, so you would have to come all the way back to the front desk, just so I could hear you complain. After rekeying his cards THRICE I go up to see what the heck is the deal. You imbacile... the entire earth knows that you don't stick your key in the whole at lightning fast speeds over, and over and Over and over and over. You simply stick it in. Calm, cool and collected and wait for the "Click" and little flashing lights. You mad man, I just made you look like a darned fool when BOTH of your keys work. And I say both in capital letters, because you specifically demanded that I try BOTH.
5. "Soo.. after you get off do you want to come up to my room for Good drinks, Good talk, and Good company?" First off... no. And here are my reasons why... #1: I cannot believe you just used 3 "goods" in once sentence. #2: You are clearly promised to another woman. That ring on your left hand can indeed be seen.. As much as you don't want it to be. #3: You are probably at least 15 years older than I, I don't love that. #4: Unless that "Drink" is kool-aid... I am not legally allowed to participate. #5: No, seriously..I cannot believe the line you used on me... Imbacile!

I feel so much better.

 venting is Goooood.

I really am not a grumpy gills all the time.

I do enjoy my job a whole lot!

I am even currently at working and enjoying it.

Maybe it is the red bull I just inhaled..

or maybe it is the 7 year old child that just came to the front desk..

and in all the seriousness of a 30 year old man asked..

"Whats the crime rate like here?"

Or perhaps the lady that just came to check in and said..

"Hi, I have two registrations that I need to check in.."

Reservations....? Imbacile!