October 6th, 2010

There are a million things I could say about today, and a million little details I could entail that would not mean anything to anyone but me. So let me just sum it up.

- Elder Ricker has now been in the provo MTC for 4 1/2 hours. Is it time to come home yet?
- I said goodbye to him today at 7:30 in the morning in freezing provo weather after making a quick trip up to suprise him.
- Long drive home, cried pretty much the whole way. I am definately a baby.
- Cam home, went straight in to Bugzee. Of course, started crying. Of course he was there to lick up my tears and runny nose :]
- Next went straight into Dad. "Are you okay?" ... No. Dad hugged me while I cried and cried.
- I have already checked my e-mail three times.... I don't want to talk about it.
- Went to class, that took my mind off of things for awhile, as long as nobody talks about it, I am okay.
- Noticed little suprises Cam left for me in random parts of my luggage and school books. I sure do love that boy.
- Came home from school, Dad asked how I was again. "A little better"I say almost in tears again. "I bet he is feeling the same way" He says. I sure hope not.
- So humbled by all of the friends and family I have had checking up on me today to make sure I am doing okay. I am so blessed.
- Realizing how much he is going to learn and grow. So excited for him! - Vist mom at work. She starts talking about it. I start crying.. again.
- Going to do some homework. Then relief society craft thing with Mom. Dad still needs to give me my back to school blessing. I think tonight will be a good night.
- I know it is going to hit me again tonight.

"Ever have one of those days where you hate the world,

and anything that happens, even dropping your pen,

makes you wanna break down and cry?"

ha ha. I thought this was a pretty fitting

description for how I am feeling today.

Things will get easier :]